Monday, August 10, 2009

Do I know if my friends are in debt?

Do I know if my friends are in debt? I personally know a few are in debt because they told me, however, you just never really know. It is like saying, "I know exactly what is going on in that marriage or relationship." you don't because unless you are in that situation you can only see so much from the outside. Again I just love this statement: "Keep in mind, the problem with looking at other's people's grass is that from your side of the fence, you can only see so much."

I talked about this quote in a previous blog post about keeping up with others.

This is why it is important to focus on your own finances and not worry about what others are doing. Because at the end of the day, that debt, your spending, your habits, and your decisions are going to dictate your life. This is the basis for taking personal responsibility.

For me, taking personal responsibility was the hardest thing because I was scared and I was a perfectionist. I didn't want to accept the responsibility that I messed up and made some bad decisions. I was arrogant and I felt entitled. I had convinced myself that it was another person's problem or I would pass the blame.

The scariest moment for me during the getting out of debt process was looking in my past and saying, "yep, you really messed up but it is okay you are going to be okay." I had to remove my ego from the equation. I had to just put my ego aside and be truthful to myself for once in my life. I had to stop living the lies. I had to learn to love myself for who I was in that moment- mistakes and all.

I still mess up and still make mistakes but I am okay with that now. I take personal responsibility for the good and bad. It builds character. My grandfather always said, "God doesn't ever give you more than you can handle in any given moment." You are a stronger person for your struggles. You can be more empathic for others when you go through difficult periods in your own life.

A good quote about failure:

"Every failure is a blessing in disguise, providing it teaches some needed lesson one could not have learned without it. Most so-called failures are only temporary defeats."

~ Napoleon Hill

I have been getting a lot of emails. Thank you so much! I love hearing from you and I am just so happy that you are benefiting from my blog. It makes me feel so good that I can give back to you and help you along the way. Good luck with this process you are doing great. You are not alone there are a lot of people out there that are dealing with this as well.

Action Item:

1. Do you always want to buy new items (for the house, car, kids, etc.)?

Best wishes,


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